MENTAL HEALTH IS NO JOKE.
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It’s estimated that 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. experience some form of mental illness (nami.org) and that the most common forms of mental illness are anxiety disorders. So before we begin, it’s incredibly important that if you’re reading this and you’ve experienced or are currently experiencing anxiety or panic symptoms, know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. It’s vital you know that before reading further. You are not alone.
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*DISCLAIMER*
It’s also important to note that I am NOT a mental health professional, nor do I pretend to know anything more than real therapists or psychiatrists. I’ve dealt with generalized anxiety, depression, and a panic disorder for 10 years, but I am not an expert. The following is just a list of tips and tricks I found useful for when I’m having a panic attack, what works for me. Also, this is more of a list of what to do during an actual attack, not preventative care.
LET’S BEGIN!
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^Live footage of a panic attack hitting me out of the blue
WHAT IS A PANIC ATTACK, REALLY?
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A panic attack isn’t just feeling super overwhelmed or stressed. People sometimes often use the term willy-nilly, when it’s actually a lot more complicated. According to the Mayo Clinic, a real panic attack is a sudden episode of extreme fear that triggers severe physical reactions. Basically, it feels like you’re dying when you’re definitely not.
The most common symptoms include a sense of impending doom or danger, a pounding heart, sweating, hyperventilating, dizziness, and nausea (among many others). It’s the WORST. Some people may only experience 1-2 panic attacks in their lifetime, while the lucky others (like me) who experience them often, have a panic disorder.
AND NOW, THE TIPS TO HELP STOP A PANIC ATTACK AFTER IT’S ALREADY STARTED:
1. INVITE THE PANIC IN
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I know this seems INCREDIBLY counterintuitive, and it can be quite difficult to do. But trust me–you need to let the panic in. Bring it on. Do your worst. Come at me fucker. My therapist recommends the phrase, “Oh, and this too?” but whatever works for you, works for you. “Oh, and this too?” is a Jedi-mind trick of a phrase because it allows your brain to accept that this is happening to you, thus effectively halting the panic cycle from escalating too far.
Now, this takes time and practice for it to work, so don’t be discouraged if nothing changes in the beginning. Just work on reframing your thought process from “NONONONONONONO” to “Alright, I feel panic coming. Oh cool, this too? Let me feel it.” It’s weird, but it works.
FUN PANIC FACT: When your brain perceives a threat, it triggers your Fight or Flight Response, which is an evolutionary response that has kept the human race alive for centuries. People with panic disorders just have a brain that is a little too trigger happy (senses threats when there are none), or a brain that shoots more panic hormones than is necessary to fight a threat or flee. You probably would barely notice the panic symptoms (heart pounding, shortness of breath, nausea) if there was a real, life-threatening trigger in front of you, like a fire in your building or a tiger on the loose.
2. ADMIT YOU’RE NOT FEELING WELL
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Again, this might be extremely hard to do, but whoever said this was easy??? But the next best thing to do when having a panic attack, especially if in public, is to admit you’re feeling ill. 9 times out of 10, this stopped an attack in its tracks for me. I didn’t even have to admit I was feeling panicky. Depending on the company I was with, sometimes I just said I was feeling a bit queasy or that I started new antibiotics that were giving me weird side effects.
Most people who aren’t complete assholes totally understand when you’re being a human. Anxiety is a human illness, just like diabetes or celiac disease, and should be thought of as such. You’re human! It’s okay! People understand when you’re feeling sick! You can own up to it and ask for help.
FUN PANIC FACT: My therapist once said that the suffering from having a panic attack is not the actual panic symptoms, but the shame and self-loathing that follows. This was SO TRUE for me, and for others as well. I was so ashamed of feeling sick and panicky in front of other people that every time I had a panic attack, I felt like a failure. I felt like I was just living panic attack to panic attack–I’d get through one smoothly, but then another one would come out of nowhere and rock me to my core. It was only when I decided to also work through my shame, that my panic attacks became less frequent and more bearable.
3. CREATE TENSION, THEN RELEASE.
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Getting through a panic attack is all about distracting your brain. It needs to get off the “panic carousel” of going round and round and round until your anxiety spirals out of control. A way to do this is to create tension in your body, and then release. I like to clench my fists as tight as I can, nails digging into my palm, and then let go. You can also do this with your feet, or squeeze your legs together and then release. The physical sensation is another pathway your brain can follow, helping it focus on something other than the panic.
FUN PANIC FACT: The mind-to-body connection is super strong–studies show that just standing up straighter and doing a “superhero pose” can improve your mood. So can regular cardio exercise and healthy eating. But you already knew that 😉
4. FINGER TOUCH MANTRA
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In the same vein of distracting your brain, you can also do what my therapist has dubbed the “finger touch mantra.” This is the act of touching each of your fingers to your thumb while repeating a mantra or recitation that helps you. I like to repeat, “Oh and this too?” and/or “I feel the peace of the Lord, O my soul” (Catholic schoolgirl check). Find what works for you and stick with it, touching your fingers on every syllable and repeating as much as necessary.
FUN PANIC FACT: Your anxiety comes from YOU, not from your surroundings. I know this sounds harsh, but it’s true. I used to try to avoid places or situations that gave me anxiety; the grocery store, claustrophobic restaurants, movie theaters, or even just inside a friend’s car would trigger my anxiety. Every time I made plans with friends or (God forbid) went on a date with a real-live man, I’d try to control the situation by choosing to only go to places I was familiar with and by driving myself so I’d always have an out. This is no way to live!!! Studies show that it doesn’t work anyway. Just do what you want and be who you want to be. Remember: you’ve already accepted you’ll have anxiety either way, so what is there to fear?
5. QUIZ YOURSELF
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Know a lot about American history? Math formulas? GoT trivia? Use it! Quiz yourself (or have others quiz you) when you’re panicking to distract your brain. I was the 5th Grade U.S. states and capitals test high-scorer (nbd) so I recite the states and capitals in alphabetical order when I feel the panic creep in. It takes some thinking to remember factoids, so this can help get your brain off the “panic carousel.“
When I had a massive PTSD-monster of a panic attack (also known as an acute stress reaction) when I was alone in Europe, (another story for another time) my parents literally challenged me to text them the titles of all the chapters in Harry Potter and the Sorceror’s Stone to help me get through my panic.
If trivia isn’t your thing, just start listing all your favorite ice cream flavors, or as many dog breeds that you can think of. It works!
FINAL THOUGHTS:
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Ultimately, all these tips and tricks are a band-aid solution. They work well enough to get you through a panic attack, but if you really want to stop having panic attacks altogether, SEE A DOCTOR. They know what they’re doing.
I haven’t had a full-blown panic attack in six months because I now go to a licensed CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) therapist and a psychiatrist who prescribes me anti-depressants. I needed all three: wellness/general health (exercise, meditation, etc), CBT therapy, and medication. All are necessary. And I’m so much happier than I’ve been in years because of them. I only wish I’d gone to a psychiatrist sooner!
But whatever your mental health journey may be, know that you are not alone and that you can feel better someday. Just take that first step.
Good luck 😊
You can learn more about anxiety disorders here.
And if you need to talk to someone immediately, the US National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. A list of international suicide hotlines can be found here.